Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Spending Time With My Expensive Quilt Pattern

Well, today I spent some quality time over lunch with my expensive quilt pattern.  It needed some air after being in that shipping sleeve for so long.  And I wanted to make sure the place we ate was appropriate for its social standing, after it does come from money.  I ate at Thai Chili. The proprietor loved the pattern, but I was not about to let her touch it, the rich have their priorities, you know.

The expensive quilt pattern shared a meal with the most wonderful Lettuce Chicken and some Hot and Sour Soup that was so hot I choked in the middle of the meal.  The gentleman at the next table over grew quite concerned over the sounds I was making.  Sputtering and gagging.  It must have been terrible for the other patrons to hear me.  He kept turning around and asking me if I was OK and could he help.  I thanked him politely and tried to stop choking, or at least choke more quietly because I wanted to take the spotlight off me and that pattern in case he had designs on it.

I really do not like things that hot.  And she knows that.  I wonder why she put all those chilies in there......maybe she is lusting after my expensive pattern for herself.  Hmmmm.  She is, after all, an Asian woman with a knife.  Maybe she was going to knock me off and take it to sell on the black market, like they do kidneys.....

At one point I thought I was going to die right there, and that expensive pattern would have been for naught.  Worse yet, I have not had a chance to change my will so it will have a good home after I am gone.  Now, lets see.....who do I like the most?  Maybe we need a contest of some sort to determine who has the best offer.

And thinking about it, I probably should get an addendum to the insurance policy to cover it.  I wouldn't want it to accidently get dunked into some egg drop soup next time out.

glen:  see, I can do short stories as well as the next guy and you didn't have to pay a dime!




8 comments:

  1. You are a very good story teller!! So design your own patterns with stories to go with them and charge a small fortune for them!!!

    Hey, a stack of the 21 fat quarters you need is on Ebay for about 75$!! Never mind the pattern!

    And I did find some patterns that were more expensive, so this pattern does have some big brothers and sisters!

    And now I want some hot Sweet And Sour soup... Oh, and some lettuce wraps! I'm starving, and it's your fault.. :)

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  2. this is like that $250 cookie recipe. you're getting your money's worth by sharing it with all of us!

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  3. That was hilarious! Just what I needed to start my day. Thanks.

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    1. I have two of her paper pieced patterns. One I bought as a kit and it was about $45. the pattern for the other was only about $12. what the heck?!!

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  4. ROFL! Now your biggest problem is that Frank is going to have to build a shelf just for the pattern as this high society pattern will not want to share a space with the rif raff that's there now.

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  5. Glory be, put that pattern 1. somewhere you will be able to locate it again and 2. somewhere the dogs won't get a hold of it and have it for a snack!

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  6. This purchase was, how shall I put it delicately?...unfortunate. For you, and your wallet, that is! For us, out here in Blogland, it is simply delightful and hysterical! So many posts, so much laughter ahead!
    Start picking up pennies off of the street to pay for some fabric for this quilt (although be quick about it as I hear that they may be going the way of the Dodo...)
    Tricia

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