Tuesday, April 26, 2016


well, I survived the dentist this morning.  Although my jaw is very sore.  They wedge your mouth open with a hard black piece of rubber.  Not as kinky as you might think.

I don't pretend to know what it takes to do a modern root canal but this one felt and sounded very space/industrial/superfund-ish.

Hand me the C4.  Ok, now the Super Jack Hammer. The Robot Claw, please.  Oh, and the Mercury salvaged from Love Canal.

Let's close up, hand me the electronic chip implant.  Can you focus the microwave beam collector a bit finer, yes, that ought to send to the NSA quite nicely.  That and her childhood Polio Vaccination should make her bank accounts open to the Democratic Socialists Fund.

Great, now the Industrial Tamper, seal it off with this blowtorch, and.........done!


Moby and Ahab came out for breakfast.  They both ate the Goldfish Chow I dropped in the "corner" of their pot.  I figure if I turn off the fountain and drop their chow in the same place each time, they will get to liking me.

Seems to be working, too.  They came out for a few more pellets this afternoon when I was showing off for Frank, Wan' ta thee what a great augh twainer I am?  Wath me twain fithes!

I still slur a bit from this morning.

This time they stayed for a while until a funky dog nose poked over.....hey, whatcha lookin' at, huh mom?

Ahh...3 o'clock bones are overdue.......


  1. They can put a computer in your phone, do heart transplants with robots, have people living in outer space - why oh why can they not figure out how to do dentistry with no pain or at least make tools that don't sound like a chainsaw or a power tool. I always take the laughing gas and put headphones on and turn it up so I don't hear that dang drill. And don't forget that might they shine in your face and the frozen face with the drooling after. Torture, pure evil torture!

  2. When I had mine they installed a rubber raincoat so that I wouldn't swallow any of the crap they drilled out but no wedge. That would have freaked me out!

  3. My guy uses what he calls a "mouth dam" - I suspect that is much like what patty a. described above. I agree with the terminology - but your version is MUCH funnier than mine.

  4. My guy kept asking me if I was in pain. I couldn't move and kept forgetting to breathe (my first reaction to fear). Finally, he told me that from my face and body expressions he was sure I was in pain--every muscle tense, not breathing, that jaw spreader thingy, and white knuckle fear spread throughout the body. And not one whit of pain! Is it possible to cry wolf when you can't cry?

    Oh, sorry to tell you, but UFO's, TSA, KGB, and several other letters are tracking you as we blog.


I love to hear from friends! Thanks for leaving a message!