Thursday, November 1, 2012

Marriage Advice Wanted

Maybe you can give me some advice.  I am sure you have run into this in your own significnat other, who goes in and out of times being a "not so significant" other.  This is the situation:

not our back yard!
I get dressed each morning.  Every morning he has known me, I have gotten dressed.  I wear a lot of black  and need bifocals for close seeing.  I have 20/20 far seeing, but can't see squat up close.  So last week, I put on a black slinky rayon top and went out to breakfast.  He ate with me, talked with me, looked at me, walked half a mile with me and kissed me.  And left for work.  By lunchtime, I realize there is a tag bothering my arm on the left bottom of the top.  Yep, inside out!

Well, maybe he didn't notice.  Yeah, right.  Try this one.

This morning same deal.  Except we go to lunch in a nice restaurant and walk around the grocery store.  Just now I realize my shirt is on inside out.  The inset pockets are definitely on the outside.  Now don't you think he could have said something?

Should I kick him to the curb for not ever paying attention to me?

It is no wonder I buy yard after yard of material and run off with my friends on quilting weekends in the country and Quilt shows in Houston.  It is no wonder why I spend my day with the dogs in the yard and sewing machines in the studio.


  1. Naw, keep him around for the good times. Just plain to him that if he sees tag on outside to please tell him. He may have thought it was a new fashion. Besides do you really think he notices much you don't bring his attention to?

  2. Are you sure you want m a r t i a l advice? I can understand how you feel. There is just a little bit missing in men's brain. They mean no harm. Carmen

  3. sometimes they just do not see us I think- I haven't had the inside out shirt thing, but I have had the spot on the face thing or hair sticking out at a weird angle thing with no mention at all from the man that claims he has loved me for 40 years

  4. THey dont see that stuff usually. I went to Walmart in my light yellow with a turquoise bra underneath and in the darker room it wasnt noticeable but out in the natural light....WHOA. And I am also allowed to parade around with what I call Cockatoo hair. When I discovered the transgressions and brought it up I was told I fit in perfectly with the rest of the Walmart clientelle... Ah well just smile and laugh. In the greater scheme of things this is minutia :)

  5. I have to read it all and laugh a little. Sorry. I think my husband would notice at lunch and then laugh out load and make fun of me the rest of the day. So maybe not noticing at all is better. I do the tag or inside out thing now and then. I am very famous for the big drip on my shirt and the newer the shirt the more likely it will happen. We all need to spend time quilting with friends. Our men may not understand it and the few men that join us find out why we love it. Dogs company is always good too.

  6. Is this really a big enough deal to kick him to the curb? There are men out there that dont come home at night, that cheat on their wives, or worse. I know its irritating but there has to be some good in him, otherwise how did you last this long? Why not just ask him to "see" for you the things you cant see. He may just need to be needed. Blessings,susan

  7. What? He didn't notice a tag?!?! No, no curb for him. Wear nothing to breakfast and see what he does :o) My husband only notices things when they are related to his guns, knives, or a quilt that he really wants me to make for him. But when I do something special, like wear a dress just for him or make him a special dinner, he does notice. Does your hubby? We both take each other for granted - it comes with time and the ease of a relationship that married people tend to fall into that tends to make each other invisible. Maybe you should do something just the two of you for a while. No goggies, no fabrics, no "whatever he likes to do on his own" - just the two of you. Quiet time in the woods where he can't get away is my favorite thing. I can talk to him and he has to listen, but I listen to him too. I don't hold it against him, just ask for a change or what I can do to help us improve the situation. Have you asked him if his eye sight is alright? He is a guy and may be a little embarrassed to say it. Just ask him. The hubs and I have a policy, we talk about it. We each get a little simmer time before we have to spill it. Curbing him for a tag and inside out shirt? Try doing something to his shirt and see if he notices it! I hate to make light of the situation, but you being upset without knowing the whole story only bugs you, he's oblivious! Just talk to him, ask him, tell him how you feel. Snuggle with the pups before you do it (furry courage)! Thinking of you, Megan


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