Ralph is definitely feeling better

Know how I can tell?  By the level of destruction.

Yesterday I took the bird seed bag inside to cut the top off to facilitate pouring it into the container.  I got distracted when Frank called me to help him with the bikes.  When I went back inside, there was birdseed all over the living room.                                                                 

                                                                                And this:

Then this morning he was so busy I brought him into the bathroom with me as I washed my hair.  Frank came in to get dressed and he must have left the dog gate I placed on the bedroom door to keep wandering noses from escaping to the rest of the house.  I noticed it was too quiet and went searching for Ralph with my hair dripping wet.   My biking gloves needed modifying, the holes needed to be larger I guess, because I found this:   

Then there was the four shoes he brought out to me.  And they matched!  He chooses well.  And looks innocent enough.  Maybe I can pass on the judgement on that one.

But the exercise bands, Ralphie.  I could just chock this one up to the gods not really wanting me to exercise so they sent me a dog to chew up the equipment.  Yes, that is good.

And he did look like this when I asked him about it:

He said he heard voices in his head that told him to chew all the exercise equipment he could find and do it fast!

But after the face cloth from the dirty clothes (Chloe the Smelly Basset always chose Carrie's lime green thong at an inopportune moment), Frank's socks, the basket with my pot holders (and he didn't lose a single potholder along the way) and the garbage basket from the bedroom that held the lint from the dryer -- well, let's just say he got booted for a while.  This is what a really really really sad Basset boy looks like.  See Chloe the Smelly Basset whispering to him?  Those are probably the voices he is hearing.............